Invisible?

Am I invisible? Perhaps I am, but, do I really want to be visible? Is it wrong for me to want to hide in the shadows and not be seen? Please, direct your attention away from me. Is it wrong for me to want to remain unheard? I hate my voice, anyway. Why should I speak?

I walk slow. Head down. Hands in my pocket.hoping not to be noticed. I wear clothing in dark colors as not to stand out–though the clothing helps me to feel more like me, so it just might cause me to stand out anyway. I am tired of the attention. The glaring eyes. The upturned noses. The sneering mouths. The whispering words. The muffled laughs. The pointing fingers. Attention is something I do not want, so I try to remain invisible. It is my own choice.

A comment pulls me out of my thoughts. I swallow the lump in my throat as my brain registers the stranger’s words.

Ah.

Unexpected.

Not an insult. Not a laugh. Not a passive-aggressive slight. Only a beautiful human, being kind. Addressing me with respect. Smiling at me. I smile, too. An expression long neglected by my face, but my heart feels something.

Maybe I do want to be visible. Visible to the people who understand me. Visible to a world that accepts me. Visible to those who love me…those who I can love back with every fiber of my being.

Maybe I do want to be heard. By those who won’t make fun of my voice. By those who will actually listen to what I have to say. By those who will reply as if I am a beautiful human.

  Because I am.

I am a human just like everybody else. And I will be seen, just like everybody else. I cannot be invisible, even if I try…

…I only wish I didn’t feel the need to.